we participated in three events woven into the Big Indian Wedding extravaganza that brought us to Bengaluru – all amazing and fascinating and intertwined. my understanding of the various activities and their significance is, at best, rudimentary so i invite you to web-search any aspect that piques your curiosity.
we were invited, first, to the home of the groom's parents for a HALDI and DEVARA SAMARADHANE. while Haldi is common across India, the Devara Samaradhane (the prayers that are offered) is more local to south Indians and especially to Brahmin castes. the Haldi ceremony, a ritual "holy bath", involves applying turmeric powder to the bride and groom. sometimes thrown, sometimes scattered, in this case it was quite calmly, and with great love, daubed on the couple's faces, hands and feet by many women present at the event. turmeric (the Haldi) is considered auspicious and is used in many aspects of Indian life – in this instance, to cleanse and purify, to prepare the bride and groom for their prospective union and for a prosperous future life together. because the groom's parents come from different religious traditions, the ceremony integrated Catholic blessings along with traditional Hindu ones. the Catholic ceremony The Roce is comparable to the Haldi and involves anointing the bride and groom with coconut milk.
women appeared to be in charge of most of the ritual activities of the day.
while all this was going on, there was a crew of men in the street building a remarkable 4 pillared archway out of coconut leaves that are woven together in a fabulous pattern. this type of arch, the MANAVARAI, is sometimes constructed from just coconut leaves and their spines. other times, as happened here, the patterned coconut leaves are affixed to a metal framework which is then adorned with hundreds of fresh flowers (which also adorn the house doorway and the altars used in the ceremonies). pieces of this structure get blessed as it's made and it signifies to passersby, and to the whole world at large, that a wedding is underway.
in addition to witnessing the ritual, it was the first time i was in the midst of a large social gathering of Indians (75+ family and friends). i was very plugged in, adrenalized in social mode, and my sensory apparati were firing on all cylinders. it was hot in the house (to be fair, it was HOT EVERYWHERE, often 90+ degrees). there was food cooking somewhere which smelled divine. there was a swirling spectrum of vibrant rainbow saris. there were hundreds and hundreds of fresh flowers everywhere. and i was bathed in the sounds of Kannada (a south Indian dialect ) along with the lyrical music of Indian-accented English. after the ceremony, lunch was served on a roof terrace - a fabulous sampler of south Indian delights served in tiny portions so we could experience a full panoply of tastes.
along with the ubiquitous army of personal smartphones, there were professional video and photography crews at each event. in this way, the ancient traditions got counterbalanced by contemporary digital reality. the room was crowded with tripods, lens and lights. and it seemed almost more important that the cameras "see" the event than those of us who'd come to witness. digital photos and video will be around in perpetuity while memory is often short and temporary.
lunch was followed by MEHNDI body art for anyone who wanted to get henna painted as this, too, is an ancient practice associated with the wedding ceremony.
it was a moving day of bonding: the bride and groom to each other and the families and friends to one another.
garlands decorating doorways - fresh flowers, baby pineapples, and unbloomed lotuses
preparing the space
more preparation
cornucopia of rainbow bracelets
table full of ceremonial elements
tiny flame of puja
